Top ten reasons Snake Plissken would drop your punk ass.

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Here at Hey Stupid! we already know that Snake could easily take down the entire staff and destroy our empire if he so chose, but being that we never made him believe he had a fake disease or asked him to rescue a president we would hope that he wouldn’t. You see we respect Snake and his prowess with guns and hand to hand combat as well as his ability to pilot almost any vehicle with minimal effort. You on the other hand are completely fucked. Now, the top ten reasons Snake Plissken would drop your punk ass.

10) You want him to give a fuck about your war… or your president.

9) You’re an asshole who tries to stick him.

8 ) You force him to play basketball for your amusement.

7) You try to cut out his one beautiful blue eye.

6) Calling him Plissken when he wants to be called Snake…Or vice versa.

5) Sentencing him to life in New York maximum security prison

4) Sentencing him to life on the Island of Los Angeles

3) You express your opinion that you thought he’d be taller.

2) You say that Overboard is Kurt Russell’s best work.

1) You cast Gerard James Butler for anything. Ever.

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