Genius Credit-Card Company.

A long time ago, I posted a blog telling you about my experience with this credit card company in Omaha. It was pretty weird. They made it out like there were 3 ppl working for this company, and today I had a similar experience with them.

I was charged 35 dollars on my credit card for some type of account protection. I called a customer service rep last night to ask about it. She was in Omaha. She told me to call them today and get it removed and get the 35 credited on my statement.

I just called this place, and it is the same phone number and address to the real office. I have a suspicion that no more than 4 people work at this building. This woman went into beast mode and talked me out of cancelling the subscription. But that’s not the point of this blog. The point is that this place is genius. They have hired middle-aged women who all have kids around my age. These women are super-motherly and talk to you like you are their kid. She basically said this:

Me: “I want to cancel the subscription.”
“What? Why?”
“Uh, because I… just please cancel it?”
“Why would you want to do that?”
“Because it is costing me 35 dollars a month, thats why.”
“This coverage is in case you die or have to quit your job to take care of a loved one. Do you understand that? Have you thought this through at all?”
“Wait, what?”
“I can’t believe I raised a son who would cancel this subscription!”
“Holy fuck, lady.”
“Your father and I have been working at this company since 1976 to put you and Sally thru daycare and college and all we get in return is you ungrateful ASSHOLES calling and canceling the service!”
“Holy schnikies, what the hell are you talking about?”
“Okay, okay… I will lower your coverage to 22 per month and credit you the 35 for this month. That way you are still covered. Would you please consider this? Please? Gramma McCrudden told me before she died that she wants you to consider this.”
“Alright! Lower the rate!”

When I ordered the card, it was like I was talking to my father. This is honest to God how it went down:

Middle aged guy named Ray, breathing into phone: “Which card did you want?”
“Well… I dont know?”
Ray, eating something, I can hear TV in background: “You can have the regular or the preferred.”
“I guess preferred.”
“Yeah, you can take that one.”
“Are you done?”

Last night when I called that rep, she also talked to me like I was her son. It was pretty intense. I definitely wanted to bang her, because she sounded like Cimba’s mom.

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