Pretty much since the beginning of this decade there have been a lot of bands that are total shit that people go on and on about because people suck and have no taste in music whatsoever. What is truly shocking though is that there have been shitty shitty bands that people go nuts for and for some reason they are still around today. Why? They suck. The worst part is, the people that like these bands are always complete tools who go on and on about how they’re the greatest bands ever. Let’s take a look.
Jethro Tull: This band is hands down god awful. Sure Locomotive Breath is fun to listen to after the two minute piano intro is over, but the rest of everything they have ever recorded makes me want to beat a child to death with a puppy in front of a nun. We get it Ian Anderson, you know how to play the flute, way to go dude. The band is named for a god damned British farmer and has taken the art of being strange to new and unexciting levels. Listening to the band is like getting a hand job from a Thai shemale hooker with three fingers. Sure it is semi interesting because it is a Thai shemale hooker with three fingers, but because she only has three fingers with which to grip your shaft, the hand job over all sucks. Just like every Jethro Tull album…ever.
Rush: Rush sucks right out loud. Mostly because as near as I can tell the bands biggest fans are the band themselves. Then the fan hierarchy goes like this: Stoners, people who aren’t cool enough to enjoy anything else, bass players who think bass players are cool, people who mistakenly got into Rush because they thought Geddy Lee was a chick because he has a girl voice. I am serious, everything that is wrong with this band is, well, everything. I just fucking hate Rush. From the stupid ass bass line that people blow their loads about to the shitty keyboard playing, to the terrible guitar riffs to the supremely overrated mechanical drumming of Neil Pert, this band makes me want to kill myself. What exactly is Neil Pert trying to prove with that drum set any way? On top of all that they’re Canadian.