I just stole 2 packs of crackers out of a guy’s desk and that reminded me of something my dad always eats.
CHEESE AND CRACKERS SNACK:
“Hey, listen… you want a goddamn good snack real quick? You get a box of crackers and some cheese. Fold the cheese into four equal squares. That’s 4 crackers and cheese sandwiches. Bet you never thought of that one.”
POTATO CHIPS AND ICE CREAM SNACK:
“Hey, I eat what I want. You come into my house and see all these goodies that’s because I eat whatever the fuck I feel like eating. I like to get a big bowl of ice cream and dip my chips in it.”
BREAD AND BUTTER SNACK:
“I’ll tell ya what. You want another goddamn snack? How about some white bread with butter all over it? I like some bread and butter when i’m watching a baseball game on TV. HOOLIE CHRIST, HE HIT ANOTHER ONE.”
“Let me tell you something. You want to eat a quick supper? Get some goddamn hamburg and cook up a hamberger real quick. Put some cheese on there too if you want.”
JO-JO’S PIZZA (Pepperoni, Green Peppers, Onions):
“Hey… best goddamn pizza in Sidman. Right across from Deyarmin’s, tell John I got those workgloves for him that I stole from work.”
That concludes everything my father eats.